Seriously, it was like I'd fallen in love with this job. When I first read the posting, I thought it sounded cool, definitely worth checking out. I read up on the agency, the program, its missions and goals. Definitely my kind of thing. As I said to my husband, It's like all my experience meshes in this job. All those weird seemingly random things I've done, could reasonably be said to be preparation for this job. After that first interview, I was hooked. This was the one for me. I was valued, I was appreciated. When I got a call the next day for a follow-up, I even felt a little bit loved. I could picture my future there. I imagined myself telling someone where I worked. "I just love it," I said to my imaginary friend.
The second interview just confirmed my adoration. Everything felt comfortable, relaxed, natural. I knew all the answers to all the questions. We shared jokes. The eye contact was sizzling. Leaving, I loved just walking down the hall, going down the elevator, feeling like this was my place. I would get to know those security guards at the front door. That would be the bathroom in which I brushed my teeth after lunch. Ooh, right across the street, there's the little cafe where I and my new co-workers would do lunch together. I would learn the secrets of the parking garage, what time to arrive to get the best spots. Sigh.
Then three days went by and no phone call. I began to doubt. Finally I sent a cheery email: Just wondering about the position! Had a great chat on Monday!
I went out and returned to a blinking message on my machine. Sum: They just weren't that into me. Sob. Descent into unreasonable self-recriminations: I must be a loser; No one will ever want me; WTF am I going to do now? Put myself out there again? I don't think so!
I do have another interview (different job) on Monday, though, so maybe I should prepare myself for another rollercoaster ride. I don't think I'm going to fall in love again so soon, but you never know.